The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
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