I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
do herpes really smell.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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