i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize