There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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