Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
