ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
