Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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