Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
