Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize