If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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