she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
