If that was your dad, he is hot
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
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