come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
