Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
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