fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
