I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
