all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Randomize
