So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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