My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
