Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I hate all girls vehemently.
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
