My hair reeks of homosexuality.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I need to align my fucking chakras
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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