We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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