i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize