Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
