"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
