i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
