You can't motorboat a personality
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
