If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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