Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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