So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
it's great music for shaving your balls
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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