I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize