your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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