i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize