dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
Randomize