I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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