apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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