also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize