Moan for me like Helen Keller
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize