Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
this hospital has no fireball
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
