Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize