I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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