Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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