So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
Randomize
