the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Randomize
