We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
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