Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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