So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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