sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
Randomize
