Just met a synchronized swimmer, can you imagine the things she could do in the water
Legs for days
Harpoon that
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
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