we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize
