we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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